Elise Brianne Todd
Live Out Loud
Isn't it funny?
We watch movies and read novels and see theatre and listen to music that all tell stories of tremendous feeling. We're in love with stories of good vs. evil, Marvel superheroes, lovesick high schoolers, and hilarious farces. All these stories bring colour to our life. How sad the world would be without them.
Yet we deny the existence of these things in our real lives. We say that we listen to this music or we read this book because it helps us escape from real life. The things that happen to these protagonists only actually happen once in a blue moon. They're for the celebrities and star-crossed lovers. Not us regular folk.
However, I've noticed something curious recently. As a twenty-something in college, and despite having as little life experience as I do, I've gone through (and am currently going through) one of these movie-like situations. To be quite frank with you and to hopefully convince you more fully of the point I want to make, I'll tell you about it. I've experienced a rather deep (and confusing) unrequited love.
Yes. It may be cheesy. Immature. I know that's what you're thinking. But you know what? What I felt was anything but immature. It was the deepest, most human, most soul-touching thing that's ever happened to me. And it felt like a movie. You tell me it isn't a movie when the person you're in love with has a conversation with a friend in front of you about how he's going to ask out another girl without even giving you so much as a look. I'm sorry, but that crap is straight out of Les Miserables. Also crying in a chapel for two hours straight because of the need for an answer to the confused mishmash of feelings you feel that could only possibly be answered by an almighty God. Also a conversation with your mom sitting in your parents bedroom about what love really is and how to recognize it.
Since we're on the topic of love, I've also heard a story (from someone my age, by the way) of love so deep that they feel they'll never love anyone else again as much as they loved this person. They said it was, (and I quote!) "magical". I'm not making this stuff up!
There's a reason these songs were written. There's a reason these movies make as much money as they do. There's a reason these novels make us cry. These stories are real. And not just once-in-a-lifetime real. They are everyday real. They are happening all around us, but we minimize them for the sake of wanting to be "normal" and "mature". We don't want to be labeled as overly dramatic. You know what I think?! Screw that kind of mature! That kind of down-to-earth maturity may be impressive to your friends and family for awhile, but it will lead to you never realizing what an extraordinary life you actually lead! It's movie worthy! And I'm not just speaking to people who've experienced unrequited love like me. It's true in other aspects of our lives as well. In fact, my next post will be about how this particularly affects our careers and our place in this world.
I'm exhausted by my ordinary, everyday life. I want to find, nay, NEED to find more moments of movie-like love, of uncontrollable laughter, of awkward silence, and courageous actions. I want to live out loud! Join me!
Always, with gratitude,
Here are some lyrics from the namesake song of this article. Read them well. Credits to Brian Crawley:
Every day - sleepwalk, lockstep
No one dares to stray.
Though they may - straightlaced, shamefaced
Long to break away.
They're as lonely as can be.
Is that what they want from me?
I want to run down an open shoreline.
I want to join in a moonlit dance.
I want to swing from the branches of a tree.
I want to bathe in a hidden inlet,
And let the breeze come and dry my hair.
I want the life they took away from me.
If that makes me headstrong - fine!
That's a fault I'm glad is mine.
I want to sing when my heart is full.
I want to sing and I want to fly.
I want to soar in the sky without a cloud.
I want to live out loud!